"Ignorance Is Bliss" 6x09

This week on House we learn that you can’t always get what you want, but if you try using self-serving actions and cringe-worth manipulations you just might get what you need as we see House play nice to snag an invite; Cuddy play mean to crush House’s spirit; the patient play dumb to be happy; and Chase play tough guy to keep people off his back. Oh, the games people play….


“Ignorance Is Bliss” - House 6x09

We open on a bucolic scene of a bookstore on a small side street in Princeton, New Jersey. The shop is quaint and filled with what appears to be only the smartest of books, some used, some new. A sign says it’s the Helix Technology Bookstore. A delivery man with “Jim” silk-screened on his shirt pushes in a huge dolly of boxes. I’m wondering how many shirts he got with his name silk-screened on it instead of just having a name tag. It would seem not cost-friendly to silk-screen personalized shirts for all your employees, especially since Jim confirms to the book store owner that the owner’s old delivery guy was just laid off. I wonder if he got to take all his “Ted” t-shirts with him. Jim is kinda of…stoned, it seems. The book owner looks at him and then appears to recognize him. He gets a book of the shelf and sure enough this Jim is the same James Sidas who was the youngest graduate ever from MIT and had 3 books and 35 papers published by the time he was 18. He’s a genius with an IQ of 178 who now appears to be a stoned out delivery guy. The owner asks Jim to sign the book and although Jim initially declines saying he’s not that guy anymore, he ends up taking the pen. However, when he tries to write his hand can’t grip the pen. The owner asks if he’s okay and Jim looks very confused and dizzy. I was waiting for him to pass out and knock the rows of book shelves down like dominos, but it was not to be. Oh, Mr. Yaitanes, missed opportunities. In fact, he doesn’t even pass out and we cut to opening credits.

A bagel is being thrown on the counter at the fantastically upscale PPTH cafeteria. It’s House. He tells the clerk to put the bagel on Dr. Wilson’s tab. The girl, who’s obviously either new or completely out of touch with her surroundings, says she doesn’t know any Dr. Wilson and they don’t have “tabs.” House then says indignantly, “Do you know who I am?” She says no, and he grabs the bagels and hobbles off as she calls after him. Cuddy appears at that moment and pays the $2 for the bagel. Wow, $2 for a bagel, no wonder House makes Wilson pay. House warns Cuddy that for only $2 she only gets top half over the clothes. She laughs genuinely and I write a check made out to Hugh Laurie for $10. Sorry, got my reality lines blurred again. House casually asks what Cuddy is doing for Thanksgiving and she responds that she’s going to her sister’s house. She has a case for him. A fairly routine one, apparently, but House says, Okay and takes it. Cuddy shakes her head and takes the file back. She’s confused. She thought she’d have to bait him in order to take the real case file she’s holding. He says that this is the new way he handles things: static-guarded and tension-free. Yeah. Right. But he takes the second file and walks away. No snark. No leering. Immediately I know something’s up.

House comes to the diagnostics department to see his new band line-up. He’s got some veterans and a-team free agents now and is ready to start saving lives. House asks if anyone has seen Wilson. He has Wilson paged as they throw out some ideas, which House shoots down. Then Foreman suggests TTP (Thrombolytic……yeah, not gonna look it up ‘cause I’m runny out of time , but it’s a blood thing.) 13 agrees with him, which causes quite a stir. 13 and Foreman take a few shots about their failed relationship from House and they head off to do tests.

Taub and 13 are in the patient’s room with him and his wife. They are explaining that while TTP isn’t fatal Jim will have to be on meds and be monitored for the rest of his life. His wife needs a few explanations of the same stuff to grasp what’s going on. It appears as though Jim did not meet his wife while at MIT. Taub asks if there is anything else Jim might want to tell them: drug abuse, mental illness. Jim assures him he’s fine. He’s still so mellow as he tells Taub that he chooses to work as a courier because he was tired of not measuring up to everyone’s expectations while he was the “genius.” He met Dara, his wife and she didn’t care about him being a genius or what great things he did and he was happy for the first time. Jim tells them that he chose to be happy rather than smart.

In the doctor’s lounge, Chase is lying on the couch and touching his ring finger, now sans wedding ring. Wow. She is gone. If there was a chance at reconciliation or if he still had feelings for her you’d think he’d still have the ring on. Foreman enters and asks if Chase is okay. Does he want to go get a drink and talk? Chase says he’s got it under control. Foreman says that what Chase said about the Dibala thang and he was obviously wrong then. Point: Foreman. Chase counters with, Yeah, and we all saw how effective talking about it was. Point: Chase.

Taub and 13 are running tests. Taub asks if she thinks the patient is normal. 13 seems to think so but Taub comments that guys that smart are usually…abnormal. 13 says, “Speaking about House…you must have taken a huge pay cut.” Taub admits he did and that his wife isn’t too happy about it. Taub asks 13 about working with Foreman and she says it’s not an issue. 13 then confirms that it’s TTP, which Taub suspects. House wouldn’t just have such an easy case. He knows what’s wrong and it’s not just TTP. Taub wonders what he’s missed.

13 and Taub have come to tell House the results. Taub informs him that the tests point to TTP, but they can’t do the normal treatment because of an allergy. House asks them what they should do then. They suggest a spleenectomy. He confirms that. Now all this is happening as House is booking it down the hallway to the men’s room. He goes in and they follow him. He hollers Wilson’s name and some poor sap in the stall says he’s not in there.

Taub asks if the patient really has TTP and House confirms it. Taub thinks House is playing games with them, which he denies citing a lack of time. Yeah. Now they want to know why they took the time on such a mundane case. “Isn’t it obvious?” House asks. “To get a dinner invitation,” he says as he leaves the restroom.

House sits at the entrance to PPTH waiting as Wilson finally shows up for work. House says he missed him at breakfast and lunch and Wilson tells House he was at the dentist. Uh-huh. House informs Wilson that he’s decided what he’s going to do about Luddy. He’s going to break them up and by doing so do them a huge favor. House thinks that if his meddling breaks them up they were never meant to be in the first place and if they don’t break up, his meddling will only make them stronger. Wilson is amazed that House can turn his narcissism into an act of benevolence. You think Wilson would be used to this. House tells Wilson that he’s going to have to crash Cuddy’s Thanksgiving dinner to set his plan in motion. He needs Wilson to get Cuddy’s sister’s address. Wilson flat-out declines to be a part of any of this and tells House to stop being such a jerk. He walks off and we see House’s gears churning as he tries to come up with another scheme.

Chase is checking out the incision from Jim’s spleenectomy and it’s tiny! Wow, nice work. How do you get a big organ through such a tiny hole? Hmmmm. Chase tells him about the recovery time and Jim and Dara are excited to get on with life, ‘cause, Jim says, those boxes aren’t going to deliver colors. Yes, it makes Chase look up too and we watch the side of Poor Jim’s face slide downward as he has a stroke. I love how this show does that to stroke victims. I’m thinking it’s all CGI although I guess some good weight on a few well-placed, attached fishing lines would do the same thing. KIDDING!

Old Navy is opening at 3 AM?!?! Someone should tell them their clothes aren’t that high of a commodity.

Chase briefs the rest of the team on the downturn of their patient. They try to come up with some ideas. Meanwhile, House is dialing away on the phone. “Hello, Julia?” he says when someone picks up. “I’m Lisa’s friend, Greg House. Oh. Sorry, wrong number.” Taub asks 13 if she’s going to ask House what he’s doing, and House, using his super hearing powers, says that he’s calling all the Julia Cuddy’s in an 100-mile radius to try to track down the address. There are twelve and we hear him bombing out as the 12th one denies knowing being Lisa Cuddy’s sister. There’s a cute exchange between Taub and 13 and it’s nice to see the friendship. And, I know I’ll get slack, but 13 is way easier to take when she’s not macking on Foreman. ‘Nuff said. Foreman suggests another ailment and House assigns Chase and Taub to go check out Jim’s apartment and 13 and Foreman to go run another test. Oh, no. I spoke to soon on liking 13. She’s about to go hang out with Foreman. Great.

Taub looks around Jim’s miserable apartment and wonders how the smartest man in the world can live in such a hovel. Chase mumbles something about Jim’s happiness as they both go through Jim’s cupboards and bathroom. And yes, that apartment is TINY. Taub continues the conversation from the kitchen with Chase in the bathroom, a mere ten feet away. Taub invites Chase for dinner and gets a huge serving of “I’m okay grumpiness” for his efforts. Chase insists he’s not Kutner so Taub shouldn’t worry. Taub shrugs, simply saying that Kutner never came over for dinner either. Chase gets grumpier as he walks away and finds a pantry sized closet filled with books, notebooks and compositions. It’s Jim’s past. It’s like a bunch of journals filled with the thoughts that used to race through his brain all the time. The notebooks stop just when he met his wife. Taub doesn’t believe that Jim could just turn off his brain like that. Chase then finds a bottle of Vodka stashed away in an air vent and they may have the way Jim could turn off his brain just like that.

In the clinic, House is emerging from Exam Room One with a patient and they are both smiling pleasantly. What the? The patient genuinely thanks Dr. House, telling him he’s been wonderful and he responds with “As have you, Diana.” He used a patient’s name? A clinic patient? Cuddy is standing there at the nurse’s station and this exchange whips her head around faster than the writer’s dropped the Stacy arc back in season 2. “Be well, “ House calls after Diana as he places her chart in the done box and grabs another. Cuddy is surprised to see him there, let alone being pleasant. Nurse Brenda is no longer around, but Nurse Jeffrey spins around in his chair and tells Cuddy that House is on his 7th patient. I was expecting a head snap when he announced it, but didn’t get one. Dang. Cuddy is confused but more than that, wary. She confronts House. She says she knows he’s trying to be nice but she’s sure he has an agenda. “Wow,” House says. “Smart and sexy. Lucas is a lucky guy.” Cuddy doesn’t bite. She’s trying to decide if it’s a good agenda or a bad agenda. Either he’s trying to prove he’s changed or he’s messing with her. All for “messing with her” raise your hands? It’s unanimous. House is cute and winsome in his response, “So which is it? I’m dying to know.” And then I begin to worry when Cuddy seems to soften and actually invites House to Thanksgiving dinner! NO! Don’t do it, Cuddy. Yes, he’s improved but you knew better than anyone that His Highness, Sir Jerkiness, was like this before the infarction. Oh……no……

House walks into Wilson’s office brandishing the coveted golden ticket, the address to Julia Cuddy’s house. Wilson is surprised then skeptical when he sees that the address is over a three-hour drive away. He thinks that Cuddy is sending him to a vacant lot and that she should if she’s smart. House agrees Cuddy is smart but House has that covered. He ran the address through the Department of Motor Vehicles and it checks out. Tee-hee. Wilson again begs him not to go. Please, leave her alone. House ignores his pleas. He even invites Wilson to be his date at the dinner because, “You’re not going to want to miss this.” He leaves and shuts the door and I say outloud, “Oh, this is going to be bad….”

It is Thanksgiving Day and House is trying to pick out the right tie for the destruction of Cuddy and Lucas. His team help him decide as they bat around some ideas based on the vodka Chase found. Foreman thinks he’s an alcoholic as that would explain everything. The test can wait til after the holiday weekend, Foreman says. House disagrees, saying that since they might be wrong they should biopsy Jim’s liver today. He picks 13 and Taub due to “juniorority” and tells Foreman and Chase to go have a good Thanksgiving. Chase and Foreman really like this. 13 and Taub, not so much. House gets his tie on, puts on his jacket and heads out to battle.

13 and Taub have Jim and his wife in the room where they do biopsies. I suppose it has a name but it escapes me now. They are up in his grill about his “alcoholism!” Oh, good, Cameron didn’t take all the soapboxes when she left. The wife is shocked to hear that Jim hides taking a shot of Vodka on a daily basis. Taub and 13 chastise more as Jim, who seems to know more about what’s going on than they think, tells them this test is a complete waste of time.

My super High-Def television suddenly goes gray-like as we see House driving up to a large, fancy house. I wonder if this means anything and when I hear James Taylor’s song “Games People Play” begin I know this is not going to be good. Like when the bass viola starts to play and the lights go out during the big storm on the college girls’ slumber party. Yeah, this is bad. My theory is proved when we cut to a view of Cuddy at the dinner table and the lighting and coloring is suddenly more vivid and back to what I spent a great deal of money on to have. We cut back and forth from House approaching the house in this gray, moody ambiance to Cuddy being encircled by friends, love and laughter in a warm, bright glow. House knocks on the door and we get a great cut of Cuddy turning “at the sound” but we see she’s only looking at a clock. The door in front of House opens and he smiles at the lady and walks into the house. “Julia?” he says pleasantly. We get a shot of the house and the big dinner table in the background, not covered in food or surrounded by people. “No,” the lady replies. “I’m the house sitter. Julia’s in Hawaii with her family.” A quick cut back to Cuddy shows her happy, but her eyes are clouded as she realizes the hurt she may be causing House right now, three hours away. We cut back to House and my heart breaks for him. He finally realizes that Cuddy has set him up. He was scamming her only to get a bigger scam from her. You said it yourself, House. She’s smart. And still, my heart breaks. I see some admiration of Cuddy outfoxing the fox, but he’s also seriously hurt. The lady adds salt to the wound by saying, “You must be Dr. House. I was told to offer you a turkey sandwich.” I wanted to hug him. He kinda deserved it, but man…harsh.

Meanwhile back at PPTH, 13 and Taub have discovered that Jim’s liver is a-okay but realize that Jim’s kidney’s are in trouble. 13 hands Taub a tuna-salad sandwich as their Thanksgiving Feast because now they have to stay longer to test the kidneys.

It’s now late evening and Lucas is coming home after a wonderful evening with his girlfriend. Really. No sleepovers? Especially when Cuddy probably has Friday off of work. Hmmmm. He opens the door to find a drunk House sprawled in a living room chair. House has busted in and helped himself to a bottle of wine from Lucas’ collection. “I’ll leave a buck on the way out,” he snarks. Tee-hee. House tells Lucas that he’s not right for her. House is only just less-wrong. Then House bares his soul to Lucas saying Cuddy didn’t know whether House was really reformed or still a scam artist. Obviously, Cuddy went with the later and House knows that he’s used up his last chance. He had 832 chances. That’s her limit. Lucas offers him some coffee but House stands and declares himself pathetic and not worthy of her before falling forward onto the couch. Lucas catches him before he bounces onto the floor and this is when House tells Lucas those three little words he should be telling Cuddy, “I love her.” Now, I thought I’d be THRILLED to hear that, but something seems weird with this scene. It’s not like House to bear his soul. He still has trouble doing that with Wilson, his BFF, and although he may mean some of it, I still was left with that taste of manipulation in my mouth when the scene ended. We’ll see.

Can’t wait for Glee. The girl’s name is Aphasia. Funny. Especially for fans of a medical show. I guess her parent’s couldn’t think of a better name! Rimshot!

The team, minus House, confers around a table in the cafeteria. We find out that Chase spent Thanksgiving drinking and Taub is concerned. Chase deflects that concern like a pro, even including a put-down or two. Wow. He’s always been like House, but now it’s just getting creepy. Chase says that maybe his cough is a symptom and Taub comes up with a theory. We almost get a Foreteen Fight, but Taub blows the whistle before the gloves come out and save the audience from a fate worse than death. I knew I liked that man.

The team, minus House, has decided to put Jim on dialysis. His wife is confused by the ever changing diagnosis and for once that confusion is not based on her IQ because sister, we’re always confused about why it takes so long to get to the real diagnosis sometimes. They tell them the happy news that Jim’s going to need daily dialysis and a kidney transplant.

After that scene 13 is following Chase down the hallway. She’s asking him if he’s okay. She offers the name of her therapist. Chase says no, thanks. He just wants to be left alone. If she has advice on how to do that, then he’ll be all ears.

Cuddy knocks on the door of Wilson’s apartment and a very hung over House answers. She’s upset. She demands to know what House said to Lucas, because he broke up with her. House can’t remember how he got home, let alone what he said. Convenient. I totally don’t believe Lucas didn’t spill EVERYTHING about what House said the night before. Lucas can’t help doing that sort of thing. Cuddy says that Lucas didn’t want to come between them and let her go. House just listens with a squint. He looks like he’s nursing a killer headache. She tells him that she felt bad for scamming him, but he pretty much did what she expected. Cuddy flat-out says, “There is no us. There never will be.” House bows his head and quietly closes the door. The next shot is of an opening door. The door is to Wilson’s bathroom, where he is thankfully only trimming his sideburns and not some other part of his body. House, clearly not hungover, declares that he has been successful and that Cuddy and Lucas have broken up. Unfurl the banners and break out the bubbly. See! I knew House was faking it. I knew it was too OOC for House. Ha! That does say VOLUMES about Mr. Laurie’s acting, in that he’s so good that he can act so well as man acting drunk so badly. He tells Wilson that he can’t believe Lucas fell for his drunken declaration of love. Wilson mockingly agrees, “Yes, it’s his fault because he’s so stupid.” Then House gets what looks like his FINAL EPIPHANYTM , but we still have 20 minutes left so I know he’s just premature. There’s medicine for that, Dr. House. He limps off.

He limps into the dialysis room and calls Jim stupid. “Well, I’m rubber and you’re glue,” Jim deadpans back. House says he’s actually stupider than he should be because he’s a dextromethorphan (DXM) junkie. He takes the cough syrup not for his cough but to slow his brain down, to make him dumber. This is called “Robotripping.” I didn’t know that my first week of October had such a cool name. I just thought I had a bad chest cold! Now, normally this much DMX would fry the brain but you can counter that affect with a bit of ethynol, like a shot of vodka a day. Dara, the wife, doesn’t understand why he would throw away a gift, the gift of genius. Jim says he didn’t throw it away, he just turned it down a bit. When he wasn’t thinking so much he was happier. DID YOU HEAR THAT, HOUSE? Sorry. As I said earlier, there wasn’t much subtext in this episode. It was all spread out for all to see. A message smorgasboard! House says that long-term abuse of DXM explains all of his symptoms and tells the team to detox him. Jim says sadly, “I don’t know if I can live without it.” House pauses. “You’d be surprised what you can live without.” True that. He leaves, telling the team to make him a genius.

The transformation is complete and although he still has that nasty beard, Jim is clean from DXM. He does look healthier and his speech is clearly and more firm. He’s drawing a picture in one of his books. His brain has turned back on and he’s madly sketching away. His wife asks what he’s drawing and when he explains what it is he gets a blank look from Dara and me. There’s some discomfort and then Jim asks Dara if she can go get him some juice. When she leaves he tells Foreman in a very condescending manner just how dumb his wife really is and how he can’t stand to be around her when his mind is clear. He wants to want to be with her, but can’t. Hey, smart people are not inherantly snooty, writers. All my friends say I’m the nicest person they know.  It seems, however, that smart people can only enjoy conversations with other smart people and can only be happy among the masses if they dumb themselves down. Really. Well, maybe in Houseland.

We go to the clinic! Yeah! And House is with a very annoying patient. She gives vague answers to House’s questions and then follows up with questions of her own like, “Is the wait always this long?” and “Aren’t you always this rude?” House answers that he is always that rude so she’s not as special as she thinks. She ask him what he thinks is wrong with her. House answers that based on her answers he think she has….a lame job. She confused until he accuses her of being an Insurance Rat sent out by the insurance company to find out the quality of care at the clinic. She vehemently denies it even as he gives her the clues that helped him figure it out. She stops denying it when he finally says that he also went through her purse when she went to give the urine sample and found the list of questions she was supposed to just memorize before coming here. “I was looking for gum,” he says as he smiles at her. “You’re an ass,” she responds bitterly. “Put it in your report,” House says back. Ha. Then House offers her $20 if she’ll pretend that he wasn’t an ass when they leave the exam room. She takes him up on the offer and we see them exit the room cheerily saying good bye. Unfortunately, Cuddy isn’t around to hear the exchange. Nurse Jeffrey informs House that Cuddy has gone home for the day. Now House is really in a foul mood. He sighs in exasperation and looks around for a victim. He turns back to Jeffrey. “Hey,” he says, “have I mocked you yet for being a male nurse?” Nurse Jeffrey gives him a cold stare and deadpans, “I think this counts.” “Fair enough,” House says and moves on to find another victim. That was funny.

Dara is out in the hallway looking at her husband. Foreman approaches her. She has realized that the smart Jim is not liking the Dumb Dara. She wonders if he really loved her at all. Foreman tells her to be patient. Before it gets too maudlin Jim calls out for help. They race in and discover that he can’t feel his legs.

Taub approaches his wife late at night at their apartment. She’s not talking to him…still. He apologizes for the cut in pay. Rachel says that she’s not mad about that but won’t tell him what she is upset about; she won’t even give him the first letter. Rachel finally gets her haughty wife scorned face on and tells Taub that it was okay for him to do grunt work when he was a med student but he should be calling the shots now. She thinks he’s a big ol’ wuss for catering to House. Taub is surprised. This is not what he was expecting. And then to prove what a well-trained lap dog Taub has become his pager goes off and he knows he has to go.

Taub walks into the Diagnostic Department to snarky comments from House. The team is trying to figure out why Jim is now paralyzed. Nothing fits. House finally snarks at Chase for something, anything, because Chase is just sitting there. Chase isn’t biting. So House, loving mentor that he is, tells Chase that he better come up with something or House is going to call his ex-smarter half and have her help out. At that Chase stands up and walks in front of House. He just stares at him for a moment. House looks at him and you can see he’s trying to figure out what’s going on. Before he can do that Chase throws a strong right-hook at House’s eye, leveling him. Chase then walks out. The other team members look on in amazement and we cut to commercial as we watch House trying to get the birds and stars from circling his head.

After commercial we come back to find House sitting in Cuddy’s office. We just see the back of his head but as Cuddy comes in she reacts at seeing his face. We finally get to see why and it’s a mess. He has tape on a broken nose, a big ol’ cut above his left swollen eyebrow and a real shiner beginning. Cuddy sighs. “Are you going to be pressing charges?” she asks House. He looks confused. “Against the ottoman I tripped over?” he replies. “Against Chase,” Cuddy says. “I’m pretty sure the ottoman was working alone,” is House’s response. And then he asks her out. It’s kind of a thrown out statement so Cuddy ignores it. Cuddy tries to get House to realize they need to punish Chase for his own good and House keeps trying to get Cuddy to go out with him. Both ignore the other. Finally, Cuddy is done. She takes a deep breath. “I’m not doing this, House. It’s not fun anymore. Just do your job,” she says sadly as she walks out of her office, leaving House looking sad again. And she just summed up what I’ve been thinking about their relationship for the past few episodes, heck even the last half of last season. All this stuff they’re doing to each other used to be funny, flirtatious. They enjoyed trying to better each other and then he kissed her, and pursued her and had imaginary sex with her and it freaked her out. She then had to decide if she enjoyed the flirting because she liked House or if she’s just a flirt. And I don’t think she even knows. I’ve gotten mixed signals from Cuddy, I must admit, but this whole season, even though she’s supposedly moved on with Lucas, Cuddy doesn’t look happy. Even the scenes of them together are overshadowed by her obviously worrying, thinking, obsession about House. She’s confused at this stalemate and so am I, quite honestly. In seasons 1-4 I would have laughed and laughed at the thought of Cuddy scamming House and making him drive 6 hours round-trip on a bogus dinner invite. But now, it just made me sad for both of them. They obviously have passed the “just friends” comfort boundary but haven’t figured out the new state they’re in. I’m not sure how to solve this dilemma, either. I hope the writers have something figured out because it’s starting to bum me out.

House visits Jim in his room. House is there to bounce some ideas off Jim, who asks if he can give him a quick 20-years of medical knowledge first. House admits that he has no one else and Jim realizes a kindred spirit. “It’s lonely, isn’t it?” he asks House. House says it’s not that bad, but Jim knows he’s lying. He asks House if he ever tried to kill himself. House says, “Not quickly,” and Jim confessed to jumping off a building 12 years ago. Unfortunately, his IQ didn’t carry over to suicide attempts and he jumped into a dumpster full of garbage. He broke a bunch of ribs and did some serious damage but survived. It was while he was in the hospital, doped up on pain killers that he realized how wonderful it was to not think so much. On drugs, he suddenly wasn’t so lonely and miserable. House nods in understanding. Jim says he met his wife there. She was dumb, but happy and he was smart, but miserable. So he began taking the DMX. House finds this shocking. Remember, House’s intellect is all he thinks he has. Losing that was his biggest fear after the breakdown. But the old softie understands, as well. He fishes a bottle of cough syrup from his pocket and hands it to Jim. “Enjoy.” As he turns to leave his gets his FINAL EPIPHANYTM look, although we don’t really see it because he’s facing away from the camera. I know it was there, however, because Mr. Laurie is that dedicated of an actor. He asks Jim if he broke the bottom ribs on his left side. Jim confirms this. And with only a few minutes left I know this is it.

The team walks into the MRI room where House is injecting contrast dye into Jim. Taub tells House that this page may cost him a marriage so it better be awesome. House says the dye he’s just given Jim is to light up the spleen. If there’s no spleen then the liver will absorb it, killing the patient. House takes this moment to grab Taub and hide behind him as Chase walks in. It’s pretty funny seeing this big guy trying to use Taub as a cover. Taub asks why he wants to kill Jim, but House leads them into the monitoring room. Typing out a code he shows them why he did it. Chase did get the spleen, but only part of it. When Jim broke his ribs it cut up his spleen and sent those bits through the blood stream where they latched onto other organs. This is apparently bad and accounts for all the systems, with the original diagnosis of PPT being correct. All are amazed and Chase agrees to go take out Jim’s spleen, all of them. “Sixteen spleenectomies,” House says counting the spleens. “I’m pretty sure he gets a set of steak knives with that.” He leaves as Taub declares the reason behind the page awesome enough. Chase follows him out. House tries to walk a bit faster as he hears Chase coming after him, but Chase assures House he’ll just outrun him. Now that’s just mean. House turns to face Chase. Chase apologizes for hitting House. “I guess I deserved it,” House admits, which wow…that’s a change. “I wouldn’t be apologizing if I thought you deserved it,” Chase says. House is confused. Chase explains that everyone kept asking him if he was okay. He figured that by punching out House people would stop asking him. A look of pride comes over House’s face and I realize that Chase maybe Cameron was spot on in her assessment. I mean, Chase has always been a bit like House, less loyal, but not less selfish. They have a brief bonding moment and they leave on good terms.

Jim is recovering from his 16 spleenectomies. He tells Taub and House that he’ll go back to his life of Dumb and Dumber. He was happier. Taub asks how he’s going to keep it from his wife. “I’ve managed to do it for 12 years,” he says, matter-of-factly. Yeah, Dara must have the brain of a goldfish. She’ll just forget this whole hospital stay and the revelation of her hubby’s mega-brain ever happened. Jim thanks House for the stimulating conversation. He did enjoy using his brain, but it doesn’t make him happy. House ask Jim to tell that mega- brain goodbye and walks out. Taub follows him. He’s upset that House is letting him, even encouraging him to kick his brain to the curb. “Ignorance is bliss,” House responds wistfully. Taub gets an idea and tells House to hold that pose. He pulls out his digital camera (he carries one around?) and clicks a picture of a beaten-down House. He tells him, “We’ll start with tshirts and mugs and see how it goes,” as he runs off. House could care less why he just did that and moves on.

Taub is home early and shows Rachel the photo he took of House. “You beat up House?” she asks, scared and amazed. “Just one right hook,” Taub says without really admitting anything. But then he totally lies by saying that he was discussing the way House treats him and things got heated and BAM! Rachel is turned on by this new display of manliness from her weasley husband and jumps him on the couch. My heavens, she’s shallow. Find yourself a cave, woman.

As Cuddy leaves for the day, she sees and tries to avoid House, who’s waiting at the front desk area. House calls after her. She still ignore him. “Can’t we at least be civil, Dr. Cuddy?” he asks her. She stops and turns to him. She asks how his face is and he says he’s okay. Then he asks her if she wants tickets for a circus. He bought them off a nurse’s son (probably not Nurse Jeffery, although all things are possible these days) and he’s offering them to her an apology. She declines even after he clarifies that he won’t be coming along. “I know it doesn’t make things right between us but I wanted to do something nice.” “I don’t want them,” she says. What’s there to make right. She’s the one freakin’ out over the new path he’s taking with their relationship? He’s having a hard time making eye contact with her and she may as well have guilt tattooed over her eyebrows. She says goodnight to him and walks away. He looks after her, more sad than ever. Then it looks like he has a post tiny FINAL EPIPHANYTM, because as he watches her leave his head cocks to the side and a small smile creases his lips.

Wilson comes home to hear House declare that Cuddy and Lucas didn’t split up. House is in the bathroom checking out his bruises. House tells Wilson that because she didn’t take the tickets, even with no strings attached, it means she’s feeling guilty over continuing to hide things and lie to him. Wilson is tired of this and reminds House that Cuddy has told him numerous times to leave her alone. House just states that he predicted what would happen: either they’d break up or stay together. They’ve stayed together. “And you’re okay with that?” Wilson asks carefully. House turns back to the mirror and stares at his face. “It is what it is…” Wilson congratulates him on this decision and walks away as House painfully peels the cloth medical tape from his broken nose. Ouch.

Cuddy arrives at home to tell Lucas that she knows House knows she’s lying. Lucas asks if they need to stage another break-up, but Cuddy says no, she thinks House is going to leave them alone now. Lucas is happy, but he always is, isn’t he. He bounces up and says he’s made dinner for her and runs off to finish as Cuddy nuzzles, already in cute pink jammies. That Lucas is a great house-husband if nothing else. “Maybe House isn’t so bad after all,” Lucas calls out as he leaves for the kitchen. Cuddy looks at Rachel, “That would be nice, wouldn’t it?” she mutters and she looks like she wishes it was true. Cut to black. See! She is interested in House and she’s messing up her own brain trying to ignore the draw to be with him and go with the safe, comfortable bet of Lucas. Now, if we go with the cross-over Patient/Personal lives theme of the week I’m wondering now if Cuddy is dumbing herself down to be with Lucas. He’s certainly observant enough, but he’s no House. And maybe Cuddy isn’t so much sad as she is bored. The patient’s dilemma was because he was so smart but fell in love with a dumb chick so he had to dumb down to be happy. Both House and Cuddy are smart, clever people and therefore could be happy together. They are a good match, according to the patient’s equation on love and intellect. Hmmmmm.

Well, I’ve got to rate this episode at maybe a seven. It was fairly straight forward and came with its own theme song: “Games People Play.” The episode title infers that characters were all happy before they realized certain things and then only returned to that happiness by covering up everything again. House is the only character that again didn’t follow those themes. And maybe he wishes he had. It seems to him that if he had kept his interest in Cuddy a secret they could still have a great relationship filled with snarky remarks, longing glances and sexual tension. It appears he’s right on with Cuddy as she doesn’t feel at all comfortable or trusting or happy. But like I said earlier, maybe she’s bored. I liked Chase in this episode. He was very First Season House-like. Snarky, but charming. I enjoyed Taub as well, but really wanted to have a word with his wife. Next week’s episode looks great. I’ve heard great things about it and unfortunately it will be the last new episode until mid-January. I’m expecting a big mid-season cliff hanger. Last season they left us with an unresolved kiss and longing and a brand new baby. What’s in store for us this time! I’m excited, are you?